What you need to know as a Christian believer before tying the knot.

Being Equally Yoked 

Being equally yoked is especially important as a Christian Believer, that simply means that you and your future potential spouse are in line with and have the same spiritual beliefs morals and values. Now, this can apply to other faiths religions, etc, but of course, we only support the Christian faith here. With that being said, this by far should be the most important criteria for any believer that is considering a spouse.   Even both being of the same faith/belief you both still should consider that you are compatible in other areas which I will address later below in the post.  Marrying someone that is not a believer of the faith or someone who is not a believer at all, is a huge recipe for disaster and one of the reasons for so much divorce, simply because they will not subscribe to your belief system, morals, values, etc.. and it will be a constant tug of war trying to push that on them, which you should not do.

How he or she handles disagreements

It’s easy to overlook things like this when you’re in the lovey-dovey stages of your relationship/courtship etc,  But it is very important for you and your potential spouse to see how you both deal with your differences. There will be differences because you are two different and distinct individuals with different personalities. Things to look for: Are you both able to accept each other’s differences, quirks, flaws, and faults?  Do one or both of you get angry easy? , Do you have good problem-solving skills?

How he or she handles adversity

Adversity can come in many different forms, but mostly how will you handle the trials challenges and external factors of life with your potential spouse. If your potential spouse GOD forbid, loses their job, an income, family members, has major health or disabilities issues, will you be ready to step up support love and encourage. These are the things that will really matter when it matters most. 

How he or she handles money

Financial problems are a hot button issue and lack of money or financial resources is in the top 3 for divorce.  My recommendation here is to let the spouse who is better at budgeting do the budget for the household. If its a lack of income, preferably future husband should consider a second job, gig or business to generate income. A lot of women are also finding work at home opportunities and starting business ventures.  There are tons of ways to make money. The most important thing here is to have a financial plan going into marriage so no one feels overwhelmed carrying all the financial responsibility. If you have debts let your future spouse know what to expect and come up with a plan together !. it may require one or more of you being more frugal, making better financial decisions, etc. But worth if for a marriage that will last !. 

Knowing if you have compatible sex drives 

Its no secret here that sex is very important, pretty much the glue in a marriage, and lack of sex, is also in the top 3 for divorce.  While your seriously dating and engaged is the time to have this discussion. It is very important that you ask the right questions and that both of you be totally honest and transparent about expectations.  Ideal questions, would be how many times a week, etc.. and I don’t think it’s off the table to discuss what type of positions you both like. Also super important to know,  is do they want children, more children, etc. Don’t be afraid to ask the hard questions

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